Dating mistakes to avoid
How do you make sure the first date is followed by a second and a third—provided you remain interested in the man you are dating?
Make sure you avoid these common dating mistakes, then, especially on first dates. Doing so ensures you both have a successful dating experience. At the very least, avoiding these will spare you irritating thoughts such as “What was I thinking when I said that?” or “I wish I didn’t do that.”
Dressing inappropriately. At least make an effort to look good, if not your best, for the date. And dress in the proper attire for whatever activity you’ve planned out.
Trying a new restaurant or a place that is beyond your means and having too many plans. Don’t set yourself or your date up for embarrassment by recommending a restaurant you haven’t tried and would later regret visiting. Ditto for a place too fancy that would cost your date more than he bargained for. Also, don’t plan too many activities for your first date, especially if you don’t know each other too well yet. You may be stuck with someone who bores you to tears and have no way out. Just play it by ear.
Talking too much. There should be a fair exchange of words. And when you talk, don’t look away constantly or watch other people because this shows lack of interest in your date and whatever he has to say.
Wait until you know each other and the intentions for the relationship before jumping into bed. Leave no room for regrets.
Talking about money, politics, religion, and exes. Avoid these topics at all costs during dates. Focus on getting to know each other’s character and personality through light stories. Avoid being too sensitive and exchanging strong opinions, too. Don’t be shallow or overly confident. It’s good to talk about yourself but not in a way that makes you look like God’s gift to man.
Have sex on the first date. Even if you believe both of you are willing and ready to jump to bed on the first date, wait until you have really gotten to know each other and your intentions for the relationship before you bring sex to the equation. Leave no room for regrets.
Fantasizing about the future is a big no-no. CognitiveTherapyAssociates.com writes, “When you catch yourself trying on his last name before the third date, it's time to remind yourself to slow down. Don’t let your emotions interfere with your ability to think clearly. Until you have time to really get to know someone, it is helpful to not get ahead of yourself; don't strongly attach to some illusion you have created about the person.” This is to avoid depression if it doesn’t work out. Also avoid obsessing over details and over-analyzing the situation and the things he says and does. “Try to tap into your self-confidence and trust that if the relationship is meant to work, it will.”
Ignoring the red flags. It’s one thing not to over-analyze the things he does, but it’s also another to overlook subtle warnings such as being stood up for dates, calls left unanswered, and other jerk signals he may be sending.
Avoid these dating mistakes to be fair to yourself and your date. He may not turn out to be the man of your dreams, but if you are a great date to one man, chances are, more men would want to take you out, too. Keep your options open until you find Mr. Right.
From your experience, what other dating mistakes must we avoid?
Make sure you avoid these common dating mistakes, then, especially on first dates. Doing so ensures you both have a successful dating experience. At the very least, avoiding these will spare you irritating thoughts such as “What was I thinking when I said that?” or “I wish I didn’t do that.”
Dressing inappropriately. At least make an effort to look good, if not your best, for the date. And dress in the proper attire for whatever activity you’ve planned out.
Trying a new restaurant or a place that is beyond your means and having too many plans. Don’t set yourself or your date up for embarrassment by recommending a restaurant you haven’t tried and would later regret visiting. Ditto for a place too fancy that would cost your date more than he bargained for. Also, don’t plan too many activities for your first date, especially if you don’t know each other too well yet. You may be stuck with someone who bores you to tears and have no way out. Just play it by ear.
Talking too much. There should be a fair exchange of words. And when you talk, don’t look away constantly or watch other people because this shows lack of interest in your date and whatever he has to say.
Wait until you know each other and the intentions for the relationship before jumping into bed. Leave no room for regrets.
Talking about money, politics, religion, and exes. Avoid these topics at all costs during dates. Focus on getting to know each other’s character and personality through light stories. Avoid being too sensitive and exchanging strong opinions, too. Don’t be shallow or overly confident. It’s good to talk about yourself but not in a way that makes you look like God’s gift to man.
Have sex on the first date. Even if you believe both of you are willing and ready to jump to bed on the first date, wait until you have really gotten to know each other and your intentions for the relationship before you bring sex to the equation. Leave no room for regrets.
Fantasizing about the future is a big no-no. CognitiveTherapyAssociates.com writes, “When you catch yourself trying on his last name before the third date, it's time to remind yourself to slow down. Don’t let your emotions interfere with your ability to think clearly. Until you have time to really get to know someone, it is helpful to not get ahead of yourself; don't strongly attach to some illusion you have created about the person.” This is to avoid depression if it doesn’t work out. Also avoid obsessing over details and over-analyzing the situation and the things he says and does. “Try to tap into your self-confidence and trust that if the relationship is meant to work, it will.”
Ignoring the red flags. It’s one thing not to over-analyze the things he does, but it’s also another to overlook subtle warnings such as being stood up for dates, calls left unanswered, and other jerk signals he may be sending.
Avoid these dating mistakes to be fair to yourself and your date. He may not turn out to be the man of your dreams, but if you are a great date to one man, chances are, more men would want to take you out, too. Keep your options open until you find Mr. Right.
From your experience, what other dating mistakes must we avoid?
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